On Friendship

Maybe friendship can be found in a 5-minute encounter or in those hours you while away with someone you’ve known for so long, you forget they are a friend.

Since moving to a new city, I realize that I took my friends for granted. There’s FaceTime and texting, but it’s hard to replace the real thing. A circle of friends collected over a lifetime simply can’t be replicated over 10 months in a place I’m still learning to navigate.

Sometimes I wonder why I haven’t found a sense of belonging, a familiar group of faces and stories to fall back on, but then I remember what someone said to me last month, “Maybe we’re asking for too much.”

I think about how my boyfriend calls out for me when he comes through the door. I think about the smiling faces at our grocery and how they genuinely care if I found everything I needed. I think about the handful of good people that have welcomed me to this good city.

Maybe friendship can be found in a 5-minute encounter or in those hours you while away with someone you’ve known for so long, you forget they are a friend. I found one of the truest definitions of beauty which is, “A sign of a beautiful person is that they see beauty in others.” Maybe being a friend is like that too and maybe that is enough for now.

P.S. A reflection on friendship and making friends in new places.

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3 comments

  1. It’s hard to make friends when you’re older. But, for a good reason. When we’re young, we are so quick to find relatable qualities in others. Whether it’s the same way we dress, the same boys we like, or the same dreams of becoming a happily-ever-after princess or something. But, when we’re older, we’ve been hurt, burned or betrayed so many times that we look for longer-lasting qualities. Qualities that ensure that a friend will be there when you’re broken or lost. Qualities that reassure you that they’ll be worth your time. Qualities that are more difficult to assume over a single cup of coffee, or a brief encounter.

    But still, there are glimmers. There are tell tale signs if you know where to look. Or, re-look. 🙂

    Wishing you the best of luck in your search for friends in a “new” town.

    1. So true. I am definitely more selective about who I spend time with these days. I guess it’s a fine balance between putting yourself out there and also knowing when to draw the line. Some nights I have a way better time staying home with a home-cooked meal and a good book…maybe that means I’m just getting old or wise!

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